If you are separating or divorcing, you have a story to tell. It’s a story that starts with happiness and hopefulness and ends in sadness and separation.
When I separated, I wanted to tell my story but, frankly, it seemed nobody wanted to hear it. My friends and family felt awkward and uncomfortable yet I needed to tell it – over and over and over again. Nobody wants to hear a broken record so I guess I can’t blame them. My point is I felt all alone with my story.
As a divorce lawyer, I hear stories from my clients every day.
Do you have a story about your separation and divorce? Maybe you have friends and family who will listen. Another great way to tell your story is to journal it. Write it out as many times as you want.
Of course, you don’t want to get stuck in your story. Eventually, you need to let it go. I remember one person who told me the story of their divorce. They were very passionate, full of anger and visibly in pain. What was remarkable is that their divorce had occurred over ten years ago. Clearly, they were stuck in the past. They had not let go.
Maybe you can try creating a timeline of your life, highlighting the major events or turning points. Try to understand your mistakes, and your spouse’s mistakes, and then forgive both your spouse and yourself. When you are ready, shred or burn those stories so you can put them behind you.
I suggest you find a Family Coach to help you. These kinds of people have training in therapy with a focus on the impact of divorce. They will listen to your story and help you move through it.
I watched this movie over the weekend. It is all about the telling of the story of divorce. It’s kind of sad but it also reminded me that we all have stories. It is worth watching. I hope you will somehow feel you are not alone.