Going through a divorce is never easy. Although you may have entered into your marriage with hopes of staying together forever, it seems that it is not always that easy no matter how much you love your partner.
No matter what the causes are of your marriage troubles, often times infidelity is involved. Studies on the divorce rate in Canada have shown that anywhere from 25 to 40% of all married men will cheat on their spouse, and 20-25% of all married women will have an extramarital affair. With all of the damage that it causes to the relationship, both emotional and financial, it is a good idea to look at a few reasons for infidelity in marriage.
Biological Urges
This biological drive can be quite strong and in fact, studies have shown that it may indeed be a part of our biology and genetics.
- Genetic Makeup
Dr. Helen Fisher, suggests that even amongst monogamous couples, infidelity is persistent. ” Men carrying the 334 vasopressin allele in a specific region of the vasopressin system scored significantly lower on the Partner Bonding Scale, indicating less feelings of attachment to their spouse. “
- Evolutionary Development
Dr. Fisher goes on further, stating that both males and females benefit in a biological sense, from infidelity. Men spread their progeny fulfilling the inborn desire to procreate and make succeeding generations, and women gain financially form multiple partners and gain a ‘second father’ for their children in case the husband dies. In both cases, the subconscious biological needs are served.
Emotional Validation
According to Dr.Susan Whitbourne Ph.D, when couples overlook the emotional needs of their partner, it leaves the other partner feeling isolated, underappreciated and unloved. This often leads the unfulfilled partner to seek out emotional validation outside of the marriage.
They Have Fallen in Love With Someone Else
It’s unfortunate, but sometimes your partner has feelings for someone else. Of course, this can be devastating for the other partner, especially when your loved one has gone behind your back and slept with another. This is a common reason why your partner may be led astray as the combination of emotional closeness plus physical attraction is a powerful force. While it may be thrilling and new for them, it is devastating for you.
They Are Looking For New Experiences
It could be that you are not giving your partner the sexual experiences they crave, or it could be that the fun, romantic spark has left your marriage and your partner is seeking to re-create those times with someone else.
These are just a few of the reasons for infidelity in marriage and they can cause a great deal of suffering. For this reason, unfaithfulness is never justified, no matter what the reason. Cheating is often only a symptom of a larger problem that has been festering for a while and only by addressing these issues head on can we determine the right course of action.
If you need to speak to one of our Newmarket divorce lawyers or one of our Orillia divorce attorneys, they will be glad to assist you with any questions or concerns you might have about moving forward with a divorce.
